Dreaming

My dreams have started to be in story form.  I usually dream in more of an abstract series of events that appear nonsensical.  I haven't been writing these new dreams down only sharing them with friends.  these are in no particular order to me.

Dream date: January 2008

I dreamt I was on the road traveling in my white Ford Fiesta, and had to stop over to have my car serviced.  I pulled into a car dealership, and walked into a glass building.  There was a slender woman with long black hair, and I had a feeling of beware when I looked into her eyes.

Once my car was ready, I drove it to the parking lot to check out an electric car.  The same woman was there and she was getting out of the electric car.  She told me that the car was on sale for only 69 dollars because it was being replaced.  I was thinking how great it would be to use it for the cross country trip, she quickly discouraged me.  Stating that it had to be recharged at a filling station and that there weren't any filling stations in Texas.  Which happened to be the next state I was going to drive through.

I then noticed a crowd gathering at the south end of the parking lot.  I felt compelled to check it out.  I moved quickly to the crowd and climbed a 3 foot retaining wall to get a better look.  It appeared to be a small rectangular pool with a 5 foot by 8 foot spa like pool at the top.  I carefully walked the edge of the pool and made my way to the spa like pool.  I stared into the spa pool and saw a human like form in it.  The fluid was a murky red and thick.  Suddenly the form began to move in a sickening manner, it was human and yet not.  

In my peripherial vision I saw a 15 foot grey form to my left.  It looked as if it was concentrating on the form in the spa.  to my right a young man was standing and pacing back and forth.  He told me he was next in a very happy tone.  My heart started to fill with a message to run.  I looked towards the crowd and it was no longer there.  They all were running away and some of them were screaming.  I wanted to look at the 15 foot figure to my left but had no courage left.  

I had the above dream many months ago and it's message still remains with me.  An experiment was started and it was done with no compassion for the subjects.  It took on a religious fervor in which people were volunteering to be included in this reforming of our species.

Sophia Grace

I understand now who Evangelin is and what she is doing for me every day. She is within me in such a way I felt as if her and I were one. I now see she is my spirit guide sending me the people and resources I need as I continue my transformation.

Connect to spirit is the message I've been receiving from Evangelin. As I sit in the quiet and clear my mind I begin to know myself. I see my best interests materialize in my heart as a short list of desires. Children, my expression, creator energy, writing, soul evolution, self love, sisterhood, goddess. Much more swirls around me asking me to be the old self in a fearful voice. Spirit calls my name, but I can't quite understand it. The swirling intrusion muffles the sound of me. I go back to my list and start with children. The below is what I saw as I let go of all that called to me.

As I connect to my spirit I hear "Sophia". Beauty from within the essence of joy encircles me. A second time, I hear "Grace". A vision of a long dark haired girl standing waiting for me. I can feel she is nervous I may not see her. She's 3 years young in a red flower print dress with her hands clasped making a bowl. She's looking down into her hands shoulders slumped. I call to her "Sophia Grace"; I pause for her response. I tell her it's time to go, and she looks up. Her serious dark eyes in thought break for a moment and smile to me, yes it's time.

After the vision of my daughter, I started to receive book titles from a dear friend during conversations. Knowing that Evangelin is speaking to me through others, I bought the books and began reading. I started with the "Pleaedian Workbook" and "Chi Gung" and ended with "Family of Light". In these books I found tools to to continue my journey in this life, and much needed messages. My soul's work began at a conscious level for the first time. It feels like desire, passion for my own self. I am moving away from my old self now who was selfless, and thought of others at all times. I now hear the work I need to do, and how I must prepare for the dramatic changes ahead of me.

We are all born of love from that great white river that flows through the universe. I dreamed so long ago of flying over it and as I looked into it my vision cleared and my knowing began.

Beliefs

I have been discussing beliefs with friends for the past two years, and have been struggling with how to express myself concerning beliefs. I've been asked if I believed in God, Angels, Reincarnation, Soul Ascension, and Karma to name the top five. In most instances I find myself quieted by the question. I understand that our lives feel finite and that feeling can translate into a decision of believing or not.

Recently I shared with friends that I'm not a believer. I felt I needed to state this out loud because of the effects beliefs have on communities. I feel the severing of connections for the sake of a belief in God's word to the point pf harming another. I am discovering that beliefs are static whereas ideas are open flowing paths of energy. Ideas can occur in the heart filling a person with a sense of purpose. Ideas change and evolve as each of us evolves.

A friend responded that when asked the question of Do you believe in God. She states it's not a matter of believing, I know the divine and don't feel a need to name it. Another shared that she sees belief as something off to side of faith, and that she has faith in the something greater. Through these discussions I received the message I needed. Faith is the leap and ideas are the messages. Having faith in my ideas is what I am becoming.

I know we are all transforming into the lightness we were born from, and the transformation requires the letting go of the old self.

In my own transformation, I am at a place in which I need to let go of who I was and embrace the light that is my authentic self. This is an idea I've recently received. I have been resisting the changes in my life. The resistance is out of fear of judgement from those I love. I know I am loved and I must now let go of Kay and embrace Evangelin. I have a new dream for my life. In it are children, writing, healing, and all of this is encircled in love. I am an idea of a dream I had last night. The idea is ever changing open, soft full of love and light.

I know my light was born of the divine. I do not need to name the divine. I only need to name myself, Evangelin.

I'm living through my heart.

Ramsey Turns Two!

Ramsey's birthday party was a blast.

He had friends from school to help him celebrate by jumping and playing at Little Gym's. This is his favorite place to run, jump, laugh, and play.

Check out the air track he is jumping on with great concentration. He's the cutie in orange shorts.


His second favorite activity is to roll on the wheel. Here Mom is guiding him while he prepares for the big finish.

You can see he is happy to be a wheel. Even better is the landing!






If you'd like to see the entire album, check out my facebook photo album named

Ramsey's 2nd Birthday

Here is Ramsey blowing out is candle with a little help from Ma.